Tag Archives: skinny


Hello friends:) I have once again fallen off the face of blog land. I have been in a huge transition in my life, challenging yet lovely. I have moved in the past couple weeks, I have been a bit hormonal and eating like shit and since May 1st has begun, I have really worked hard at getting back into the flow of things.

So I am finally back to a relaxed sense of mind. I ran about 6 miles, 30 mins of weights and taught/took an hour of yoga yesterday. Today I did a running/TRX workout and tonight I’m taking a power yoga class and eating a lot better. I shall be getting back to normal but honest to goodness the last MONTH I have been eating sugar and carbs in replace of my feelings.

I wish that I would have wrote about my Art of Assisting experience when it happened! It was during the Easter weekend so now it just feels like old news to talk about but it was amazing. It’s another program from Baron Baptiste(the yoga training I went through) and it was just a complete eye opener. It was a 3 day long “assisting” training. An intense training on how to properly and confidently assist all poses in your yoga class. I did work on a lot of men in the training and it was awesome because most my comments post-assist were: “Wow I didn’t expect you to be that strong in your assist but you were right on”.

I’m a lot stronger than my little frame might portray:) Only 5’3″ but full of strength! Anyway what I took from that training in the larger scheme of things was the importance of CONNECTION. When we look people into the eyes, when we are authentic with our words, when we show true emotions, when we truly LOVE others…we create connection….And in that connection creates EMPOWERMENT. And when we become empowered, we have the opportunity to empower others.

That is my newest intention for my life. Connection. Empowerment….I say this again and again day in and day out to just throw it out into the universe. It’s amazing how much your life will change when you decide what you want most: and then make small daily steps to fulfill that. Today I have strong connection with those I love and through my teaching yoga, and through my love for others I create empowerment.

1377388_376622242440463_262925_nCreate SPACE by letting go.

Something I’ve never really been good about is showing weakness. My perfectionistic obsessiveness always brought me to a place of pushing to be perfect when I really just needed to relax…


Sometimes in life we need to take it easy. Anything we push in life surely will go away in one way or another. In my case, its battling this tendonitis. It started a year ago in my left wrist. I was jumping into handstands, crow, anything upside down. I still do these things but at that point in my life I was aggressively pushing the pain out of my mind and thinking it would go away in time. I am 27 years old and to this day (knock on wood) I’ve never broken a bone, I’ve never sprained anything and really never been hurt. Anything I have ever done has served me well and anything that hurts always went away. Time sure has changed, because I’m starting to really feel pain if I work too hard in one form of exercise…I wake up in back/shoulder pain once and awhile and realize I am no longer invincible like my ego thought I was.


My tendonitis got worse….I went to teacher training and spent the whole training working against myself with this wrist problem. When I got home from training, it got so bad that I finally went to a hand therapist. I didn’t feel things were really helping since It was just in a brace for months so I took up acupuncture. I also felt that that only helped lesson the pain for a short while. Keep in mind through all this I was still getting upside down on my mat and not modifying for shit.


Finally we tried natural injections and within a month, everything was gone. Woohooooo. It’s been about 4 or 5 months now with a good wrist.


Now my tendonitis is back and it’s in my shoulder, around my rotator cuff and down my upper arm. I couldn’t sleep for days and it felt like constant aching. I went to my chiropractor and acupuncture doc again and we are working through this.


I am also doing a 30 day yoga challenge this month.

ohhhhh the power of an addictive crazy person. Things are different now though…I have been to 6 classes in the last 5 days and have mixed in Bikram, Yin and in my normal power classes, I’m dropping my knees in chatarunga and not getting upside down. As much as I have mini panic attacks when I’m holding a chair pose prayer twist and the teacher says we can jump into side-crow if that’s in our practice, I stay still…I know now that my ego has brought me injury, and my ego will continue to try to give me injury but only if i let it.

So I learn to let go…

Quiet the ego down that tells me I will not be a good teacher if I cant do EVERYTHING.

It’s so important to be aware of how we treat our bodies and we have to mentally check in with our intentions. In my case, I had the intention of looking good. I came to my mat to prove to everyone in the room that I could follow all the teachers orders in grace. But that’s pure bullshit now isn’t it? No one gives a flying care what you do on your mat. They also don’t care what you do in your life. Everything is all up in our heads to try and wear this special mask when we are all not that special.

When we injure ourselves and continue to ignore what our bodies are trying to tell us, which is to relax and lay off a little, we cause further pain.


We need to use yoga to free our ego. Become whole. Become quiet. We come together to share the energy of breathing and moving and living…but coming to yoga to show off your damn gymnastics skills, especially on injury will only burn you out. This month I’m learning to be gentle with my body and mind….because I want this mind and body to last longer than my shitty ego sometimes:)


So create space. let it go….let go the need to be so much more than you are. be happy with yourself because you are already perfect.


I decided to make a youtube video that you can click above ↑

You can skip through the whole beginning since I never make videos and during this one, I sure did ramble a whole lot but don’t want to re-make it! Oh well!

I’m on day 3 of my Juice Cleanse where I am mainly just drinking vegetable and fruit based juice in replacement of all solid food.

I have AMAZING energy so far. I actually have more energy now than I did before I started its pretty great. I have my story above in the video but here are a few of my juices with the ingredients I added in them:




Juice #1 (my main morning juice)

3 stalks of celery
1 apple
2 leaves of kale
1 cup spinach
2 slices of honeydew
half a lemon







Juice #2: (when you’re craving sweets)

1/2 cup honeydew
1/2 cup pineapple
5 strawberries
A little mint







Macachino by Suja Elements:

Great coffee replacement  ingredients: purified water, organic coconut meat, organic almonds, organic coffee extract, organic cacao powder, organic black sesame, organic maca, organic vanilla bean, and organic coffee beans:)









I was going to buy a bunch of green SUJA Juiceoptions for when I’m on the go but they are $9 a bottle rounding up….then I remembered Whole Foods Market has freshly made green juice for 9.99 for a half gallon.

I bought this as well as “Just Beet it” by Whole Foods which consists of carrots, beets and oranges.





this was my worst one lol....i tried to be creative and add grapefruit and beets. ICK.

this was my worst one lol….i tried to be creative and add grapefruit and beets. ICK.

I blend everything and add water with a handful of ice. i drink anytime i feel hungry. i never deprive myself.

I blend everything and add water with a handful of ice. i drink anytime i feel hungry. i never deprive myself.





This week has been a relaxing one so far. I had the chance to see Bryan Kest for my second time and take his master class. As usual, it was amazing. His outlook on life is inspiring and just having the chance to listen to him speak about life and speak about yoga is something that would benefit everyone in order to live a better, more authentic life.


I wish I could have recorded his entire talking portion of the class because everything was noteworthy. He talked about how we make yoga SHIT. We bring our shit into yoga and we make it into shit. We bring in our insecurities with our bodies, we bring in our competitive nature and perfectionism issues. We make it shit. We come into yoga wanting to lose a certain amount of weight or get a yoga body because we are unhappy with the way we are. He said YOGA thinks you’re perfect and beautiful just as you are…


He talked about how the point of yoga is to gain enlightenment. It’s coming into class and opening our bodies and creating balance. Anything in life that we force, or overwork….wears out the fastest. If we go into class and the teacher says to do something, we don’t have to do it exactly as he/she says, we must listen to our bodies and modify as necessary. Your teacher doesn’t care how fancy you get and handstands won’t promise you a healthy body. The key is balance.


He discussed the idea of buying a used car….what kind of car do we want to buy? Even if its an older car, what kind of car do we want?…..We want that gently used car from the old lady in Pasadena. WHY you ask? because that old car in Pasadena is in a location with no humidity and no rust….taken care of by a lady that probably follows the speed limit and takes care of it. The last car we want to buy is one from a taxi driver in New York City. See the difference?

He uses this as an analogy for our bodies. The better we take care of our bodies, without force and with gentle moderation…will last the longest. The body we pound and overuse and not let rest will wear down quickly.


He said so many things to write down… so with this blog entry I didn’t exactly care where it went format-wise….it’s more a free-write of what I remember from my experience.


Something else that he mentioned was gratitude. We must always be grateful. When we come from a place of always always thinking “I’ll be happy when….” then we’ll never fricken be happy. We will always get something then once we have it we’ll move on to the next thing we think will create happiness for ourselves. We must come from a place of “I am happy. I am grateful for…”


One part that i could really relate to was addiction. He discussed the addict who stops the substance he/she is addicted to. There is this space of stress and boredom and a flow of emotions but once we get through that, there is serenity. It’s so very true. To be happy JUST THE WAY THINGS ARE is key. As an addict myself, I have gone through this, and it’s the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I am grateful for simplicity. I am grateful spending time alone with myself without the need to feel incomplete. When we get to this peacefulness….we develop serenity.


There was so much more but if you ever get a chance to check him out, you should. After his lecture we had a great practice filled with laughs, F-bombs and smiles. I have been so grateful for my life. I even signed up for Art of Assisting here in April and I can’t wait. This is another teacher training program through Baron Baptiste. I am grateful and excited for my life to unfold.



“Be yourself. Not because everybody else is taken, but because you’re just plain fucking awesome!”

-Rachel Brathen


Ahhhh this wise Rachel Brathen. I have been following this woman for the past year via Instagram and met her at her master class here in Kirkland and based on everything I’ve ever read from her, along with the presence she carries, you can tell she is a phenomenal down to earth real chick with authenticity pouring through in everything she does. She brings up a good point though…you are plain fucking awesome. We spend so much time trying to figure out who we are when all we have to do is just BE.

Where does your mind go when you are all alone? On a day off with no plans…what do you find yourself doing? Where does your heart gravitate towards? We are all very simple yet complicated human beings. We want to be more than we are, we want to fit in where we feel we belong…we want to look like our idols…but we forget how amazing we are all on our own.

Since I quit drinking almost 7 months ago, i spend a lot of time alone. I spend a lot of time with my yoga practice or running. I spend a lot of time with my family and very close friends…but i have given up trying to impress the rest of you. I have given up trying to find where I belong. I have given up the search for the best diet. I have given up trying to figure out what I should do with my entire life…I’m done looking for the fricken bow I thought I was supposed to find in order to wrap up my perfect looking life in a nice little present to show you all how to be perfect and fit.


Who cares. No such thing as perfection. No such thing as ANYTHING. Everyone tries too hard to be someone they are not and they stop following their heart. You are amazing and perfect just the way you are my blogger friends.

What do we do once we settle with being ourselves? Well we take what we have and we truly LIVE our life and improve it for the better. Look at your life right now and decide what’s going well…If you knew you were going to die 10 years from now, what would you do differently today?

Yoga for me if what ties everything together. I don’t see yoga as just some way to lose weight….it’s nothing like that for me at all. Yoga for me, is the fine tuning that I choose to do everyday in order to stay grounded. Yoga is love for myself, love for my life, and all people around me. Yoga teaches me that nothing is perfect and when you are living in your most difficult times, yoga teaches you to breathe through it and that life is all practice. Your yoga practice is just practice…’s not yoga perfect. This life you have is a life practice….it will never be perfect. You will never be perfect, and that is the beauty of living a life everyday filled with the love that we get to practice compassion and self-love every single day of our existence. We don’t need to see our life as some lofty competition.

So today, stop trying so hard. Get on your mat and practice love for this life. If you have a fitness goal in mind, think of it as a goal to treat your body as a temple. Your body should only digest fresh, organic food that helps your body grow and stay its best. Choose to really MOVE your body. Stop being so sedentary. Work as much as you need but remember to LIVE every other hour of your day. Self love is most important….and from there we build a solid foundation that allows others to find it for themselves. Remember how fucking amazing you are. Namaste.


I run to escape my thoughts, I run to analyze and solve problems, I run because I still can, I run because at the end of the day…I have this happiness.

Running for me is a moving meditation.

It never used to be like this, I also never ever would call myself a “runner”. Usually running is extremely hard for me…well it was. I used to buy the wrong shoes; usually Nike and I would get horrible knee pain. I never used to stretch, I never properly ate and during the run I felt like I was torturing myself.

This year has been much different. I started running again when I was going through a breakup. The freedom of running felt like I was running from that breakup and running away from the pain. Then I dealt with my alcoholism battle. I dropped one addiction and ran away from the fear of being someone that had to start from scratch. I saw my life in different eyes, sober eyes and knew that life had to change from here on out. My life has always been one of extremes..If I have one drink, I wanted 10. If I realized I drank too much, I decided sobriety it is! If I loved someone, I wanted them in my life everyday…and if the opposite was the case, I wanted nothing to do with them. I either eat everything or I want to be vegan. I either hate running…or I’m training for a fricken Ultra. As I said before…I’m one of extremes.

Anyway back to what I was saying… running now feels like moving meditation for me and since I’ve been extremely dedicated to yoga in the past year or two, my runs became different.


I learned the art of breathing.

Now when I run, no matter how fast or slow I go, I maintain the same Ujjayi breath. Many of you yogi’s know what this means…its kind of an audible snoring noise that you make breathing in and out only through the nose. I use it in my yoga practice to connect postures in vinyasa style yoga and in restorative yoga it’s helpful in sending breath to the painful spots in the body. It’s quite fantastic, and I feel that it’s what keeps me present on my runs. I just looked up other benefits from a mindbodygreen article on the benefits of Ujjayi breathing:


1. Improves concentration in the physical practice. Becoming absorbed in Ujjayi allows the practitioner to remain in poses for longer periods of time.


2. Instills endurance that enhances a flowing practice by lending a meditative quality that maintains the rhythm of the class.


3. It diminishes distractions and allows the practitioner to remain self aware and grounded in the practice.


4. Ujjayi breath regulates heating of the body. The friction of the air passing through the lungs and throat generates internal body heat. It is similar to a massage for the internal organs; as the core becomes warm from the inside, the body becomes prepared for the asana practice. This heat makes stretching safer while the inner organs can be cleansed of any toxins that have accumulated.


5. A focused Ujjayi breath can release tension and tight areas of the body.


Those 5 benefits of Ujjayi breathing came from:


Now read that list, and imagine the benefits of applying that which is usually for yoga, to running.


Anyway….here I am now with my first half marathon under my belt. In the past I thought that this seemed crazy and too long, and now that I’ve done it, I know that I probably could have kept running. The course itself was really easy for me and I was pretty relaxed and pain free the whole time despite all the hills. I knew it was a really hilly course so most my training was only done on hilly terrain.


Being with the large amount of people, 6000 around there, and all of us having different reasons to be there, different body types, different levels of strength and endurance, all with one common love, the love for running. The most amazing part of this half was being able to run the whole course with my best friend Ashley. Ashley is the one person in my life who can honestly be up for anything, any challenge and be by my side facing everything head on. We plan on doing the Rock and Roll Marathon this summer. It was also amazing seeing her parents and mine as well as my little brother at the finish line! It made me so, incredibly happy…it brought me back to my track days in middle school when they would cheer me on at every meet and I’d be the person in last place eevery single time and they would smile like I was in first. I never gave up and they never stopped being an amazing support system.






Running is beautiful and allows you to almost escape reality, and in the end all you want is more. Since the race I have had to try hard not to train too quickly and it’s difficult, because I’m hooked! I already want a taste of a marathon and hopefully within the next couple years, an Ultra. Running an Ultrathon is something I REALLY, REALLY want. Ever since reading “Eat and Run” by Scott Jurek and “Finding Ultra” by Rich Roll, I idolize them and want an Ultra in my future…if my little legs can handle it.


Anyway short little post:) Hope everyone had a lovely thanksgiving.

So it’s been around 10 days late blogging about my challenge. I don’t really care though because half of this challenge is to get over stressing out so much with being hard on myself. I often feel that I must always follow through or I will let myself down, let you down, and let the whole wide world down. When in reality, life is simple, and if I don’t get to my computer everyday, that’s probably a good thing.

The honest truth is that I haven’t been home. I live with roommates and I don’t know how much longer its going to last here because I feel completely uncomfortable living here. It’s just one person that makes me feel this way but its enough for me to pack my bags and just prefer being away…kind of sad and maybe one of the changes I should have made was moving out…but with everything going on in my near future, the last thing I want to do it make a geographical change until I know my fate.

The worst thing is the feeling of being home but not feeling at home at all. I know I need to find another place to live but it wont be this month.


Despite my lack of blog updates and being away from home for the last two weeks, I really have been making slight challenges everyday. Here is a list of some of the things I’ve been doing:

 1. Teaching Yoga:

I taught my parents/brother yoga again…dad successfully got into crow to headstand and back to crow again:)

I taught my parents/brother yoga again…dad successfully got into crow to headstand and back to crow again:)

2. Inversion Practice:

Worked on inversions and really got comfortable in forearm-stand.

Worked on inversions and really got comfortable in forearm-stand.

3. Brought my little brother to his first hot yoga vinyasa class:) and he loved it and rocked it!

4. Ran My Longest Distance

Went on my longest run ever! (11 miles) I run a lot, but usually only stick to around 5 miles. Even thought this picture says 10 it ended up being 11 because i was still a mile from home and it was 25 degrees out…way too cold to walk.

Went on my longest run ever! (11 miles) I run a lot, but usually only stick to around 5 miles. Even thought this picture says 10 it ended up being 11 because i was still a mile from home and it was 25 degrees out…way too cold to walk.

5. Started Reading “Chi Running”

I started reading "Chi Running" by Danny Dreyer and I HIGHLY recommend it!!!! It’s helped a lot.

I started reading “Chi Running” by Danny Dreyer and I HIGHLY recommend it!!!! It’s helped a lot.

6. Self-Taught Yoga Flow:

Worked on my home yoga practice…this is something I have a hard time just starting since I am weird and prefer to just do yoga around others. It was fantastic and I love home practice now. This picture is just of me practicing inversions though

Worked on my home yoga practice…this is something I have a hard time just starting since I am weird and prefer to just do yoga around others. It was fantastic and I love home practice now. This picture is just of me practicing inversions though

7. Learn to THRIVE:

Practiced with my goal coach Jacki Carr’s idea by writing “Thrive” on a post-it note and placing it under my yoga mat. By doing this we really feel a power. We much THRIVE vs. just survive.

Practiced with my goal coach Jacki Carr’s idea by writing “Thrive” on a post-it note and placing it under my yoga mat. By doing this we really feel a power. We much THRIVE vs. just survive.


8. I went indoor rock-climbing with Jessica

9. Kayak through the Locks and Watch the Sunset:

A couple days ago I went kayaking in Ballard through the locks and out past magnolia and watched the sunset in Seattle

A couple days ago I went kayaking in Ballard through the locks and out past magnolia and watched the sunset in Seattle


look at that amazing sunset! lots of waves started to pick up once out in the sound

look at that amazing sunset! lots of waves started to pick up once out in the sound

heading home and the color of the sky was insane. a wonderful day:)

heading home and the color of the sky was insane. a wonderful day:)

10. Say “No” When I Want to.

I emphasize the importance of being a “Yes” to your life…but sometimes we need to say no. It’s not about failing or letting you or another person down, its about doing what your heart pleases. November is a month of gratitude and I am grateful of OH SO MUCH…I have an amazing family that adore to pieces. I have great friends and a healthy body…but sometimes in November or any other month do you ever realize you sometimes say yes too much? Sometimes I make so many plans that my weeks are strung out with things that I don’t even WANT to do. I have random errands in between mediocre plans that don’t really help me live a full life…they are just things…busy things…to make others happy. I have used this word a lot lately because over everything we must create balance. Anything in excess is probably unnecessary.


So there you go, a little update…I’ll try and get back into my little daily update routine before the month is over and I will try to bring my laptop around with me more:)


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